I’ve been trying to figure out what to write about as a Yom Kippur, Day of Repentance topic. This Jewish High Holy Day typically brings up issues of forgiveness. I didn’t really want to delve into that once again.

Then I watched an Oprah Winfrey Master Class video about surrender, and I knew. That’s my topic: surrender. If ever there were something for a Jew to forgive himself or herself for during the High Holy Days–or for anyone to forgive themselves for any time of the year–its for not surrendering.

More than that, simply commit TO SURRENDER. It’s one of the most powerful things you can do. Seems ironic since it’s actually a passive action. When you surrender you “let go and let God,” as they say in Alcoholics Anonymous. Then amazing things happen. Your path and your purpose are revealed.

In the Master Class video (link below) Oprah talks about jogging and talking to God and singing and praying. This has been my practice–my hitbodedut. Rebbe Nachman told us to walk in the fields and talk to God, to tell hand our problems over to God, to have a conversation with God. To listen to God. I don’t run, but I walk and I cycle. I often talk, plead, pray, chant, sing, ask questions, cry, listen…try to hear or see  the plan God has for me while walking or cycling. This is just what Oprah describes.

And while she focuses on what she wants, she lets go and surrenders. She allows Something Greater to bring her “this or something better… for the highest good of all concerned.” Those are the words are was taught to offer up as I asked for something–a way to surrender my desires to the Universe. And because she is aligned with the energy, sure enough her thoughts, her focus, her intention lines up with her desire and with God’s plan for her.

As always, Oprah just says it all. I couldn’t say it better even if I keep trying.  Her message is the message I take to heart today, for the upcoming High Holy Day, for the year, for my life. I pass it on to you, my friends. Surrender to something larger than yourself. There’s a plan. You have a purpose. Let it unfold.

Watch the video…(I couldn’t find the video anywhere to updload it–sorry–so follow the link).

Have you ever had a time in your life when something just felt like a struggle? You thought you were on the right path, but obstacles just kept rising up in front of you and causing you to question if you were doing the right thing?

I had a time like this just this past month, which has been one reason I haven’t been posting much. Then I asked for a sign…and I received one.

I’ve been in New York City chaperoning my son, Julian, for a summer dance intensive. Prior to this, however, he was at the School of American Ballet (SAB), also in New York, for a five week chaperoned ballet intensive. At the end of the intensive,  Julian was accepted into SAB  for the winter term but they had no room in the dorm AND there was a possibility that the Professional Performing Arts School (PPAS), the public school he would attend, had no room for him in the senior class.

Julian, of course, wanted to attend. This was a huge opportunity that most ballet dancers would love to have offered to them. It’s also expensive any way you look at it–dorm or no dorm. (No dorm means the need for an apartment.) It also meant changing schools his senior year–if there was a school for him to attend; with no school, he’d be looking at finishing his high school degree on line (not a great choice). And for me it meant the possibility of picking up and moving to NYC for a year to chaperone him, since he couldn’t be in the dorm–and Julian, my husband and me living in a one bedroom apartment. Blech.

I got a call from PPAS telling me there was, indeed, no room in the senior class for Julian.

I looked at some very dismal one-bedroom apartments in the $2000 or under range. Some were smaller than the loft we were staying in. Some were dingy and dirty. Some were a five-floor walk up (with computer, groceries, dance bag…).

When I was just about to give up and say, “This is just too difficult. It must not be meant to be,” I turned it over to Something Bigger Than Me. A Higher Power. I asked my angels, guides and God to show me that Julian was supposed to be in New York and attend SAB and PPAS. “If it’s meant to be, show me the way. Give me a sign. Make it easy,” I said.

That was on August 11th.

On August 12th, in the morning, I got a call from SAB’s registrar. “I’ve got good news for you,” she said. “Julian has a spot in the dorm if he wants it.” It seems they had decided to squeeze three boys into a two-person room.

“That’s great!” I replied. “Let me tell my husband and Julian!”

I did just that. And while Julian was talking to my husband, Ron, on his own cell phone , my cell phone rang. It was the parent liaison from PPAS. “I’ve got great news for you,” she said. “I just spoke with my principal and we have a spot for Julian in the senior class.”

“That’s wonderful,” I replied.  “Don’t give it away!”

A sign…clear and simple.

A miracle? I guess you could call it that.

It’s amazing what happens when you ask and then stay open to really receiving and seeing or hearing the signs.

Today we signed the papers, paid the money (Ouch.) and registered my son for a year in New York City. I’ll miss him, but I feel fairly certain this is the right move for him.

How often do you ask God, a Higher Power, your angels or guides, for a sign or for guidance? And have you received signs when you did?

When I’m not considering issues related to human potential, personal growth and practical spirituality, I’m considering issues related to writing and publishing. I see that they all come down to one thing: Learning to find our soul purpose and manifest that in a way that can help others. In this way we connect to our true selves, we reach our highest potential and we come closer to God.

This past week, I saw another intersection of my two worlds. I read an article written by Sue Fischoff’s article in the Washington Post in which she reported that  ArtScroll/Mesorah Publications is in the process of digitizing many of its 1,500 publications. That means the Jewish publishing houses is turning its printed books into ebooks. However, the article explained that Jews shouldn’t expect to go online to purchase Shabbat and High Holiday prayer books–sacred texts–for IPads or other digital reading devices.

Ah…that brings up the issue of whether or not sacred texts should become digital books, or whether prayer and sacred texts should be modernized in this manner.

Rabbi Meir Zlotowitz, president of the Orthodox-run publishing house, told JTA, a Jewish news agency,  “The vision of people coming to shul on Shabbat with their e-siddur just doesn’t cut it.” Other reasons exist, including restrictions based on Jewish law. You can read more here.

Rabbi Julie Schonfeld, executive vice president of the Rabbinical Assembly, the Conservative rabbinical association, asks an important question: “Even if you could daven (pray) from a Kindle, should you?”

On Twitter, one of my “tweeple” said that praying with a Kindle would be okay during the week; on Shabbat, this would’t be okay. You’d be using an electronic device, like a tape recorder or camera, all of which are forbidden by Jewish law. Electricity is likened to lighting a fire, which is forbidden on the Sabbath; this constitutes work. Turning on a switch of any sort is work–at least for the observant Jew.

Now, I tend to pray lying in bed at night. I pray on my bicycle. I pray or chant morning prayers as I go for a walk. I even pray in the car. Sometimes I set aside a time at home to pray. I used to have more time to go to services on Friday night or Saturday morning to observe the Sabbath regularly, but my children’s schedule in the secular world precludes that most of the time. I do have a Sabbath meal each Friday night…

I pray as I can, adapting my prayer habits to my life…so at least I do pray rather than not praying at all. I suppose if using a Kindle helped me pray, that might be a good thing. My Twitter friend pointed out that people have had prayers on hand-held devices for some years now, but they haven’t used them on Shabbat.

So, how do you pray in modern times? How do you pray in a secular world (if you are Jewish)? Do you pray?

Tonight marks the first night of Hanukkah. My daughter is in New York in college this year. My son and I will be alone; my husband just left on a business trip. We just got back from a trip ourselves and with Hanukkah falling in the middle of the week and no preparation made or presents purchased, the holiday doesn’t feel very festive.

However, I received an email from Idit Klein, executive director of Keshet.  Keshet’s mission is to ensure that gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender Jews are fully included in all parts of the Jewish community. The email talked about teens like Esther, Sasha, Aaron, and Sarah of the Gay-Straight Alliance at the A. J. Heschel School in New York coming together to light the first candle of the holiday with a kavannah (intention around the blessing). They provide a superb example of the fact that the most effective way to “make things better” lies in allowing young people to make it better for themselves and their peers, in their schools, congregations, youth movements, and communities.

Please take a look at the video they made for Keshet introducing themselves and using the kavannah below for the first candle.

We dedicate this first night of Hanukkah to knowing one’s identity and standing strong against external forces. As we light the first candle, we dedicate this light to each person in our community who needs support to be steadfast, to stay grounded in an inner space of calm and courage.

(Light your candle here)

Our tradition teaches us that each good act gives forth another, one spark makes others, and a string of candles awaits us this week. We hope you will join us this Hanukkah in spreading the light of hope and strength to everyone in our community.

(Adapted by Keshet from http://www.chabad.org/theJewishWoman/article_cdo/aid/1348517/jewish/Eight-Meditations-for-the-Eight-Nights-of-Chanukah.htm.)

In that email I mentioned, Klein wrote, “We’re grateful to youth groups like BBYO for taking a strong role and forwarding the Jewish Community Pledge to their 30,000 members. But we need your help to reach every corner of our community and ensure that no young person has to feel alone or have to hide who they are during this Hanukkah or any other time. Please pass this email along to your friends, and ask them to sign the pledge as well: www.jewishcommunitypledge.org.”

Keshet helped support students at Heschel in the planning of the first school-wide program about homophobia. Learn more about Keshet’s work supporting student and teacher efforts for GLBT inclusion.

I decided it would be my gift to children all over the world today to forward her request along and to share the video and candle-lighting intention above with the hope that others will take on this cause. No child should feel alone or different. Both my children have felt this way too often. As a mother, it breaks my heart. As children, teens and young adults, this experience has colored my children’s perception of who they are. Kids don’t have to be gay or lesbian to feel different or separate or to be teased or bullied. My son, in particular, has always felt most accepted at Jewish camp and in BBYO.

This Hanukkah, give the gift of your support to Jewish children all over the world who feel different in any way–and to help teach others to accept all types of people. It doesn’t cost a dime. I’ve already signed the pledge. (You don’t have to be Jewish to do this.) Will you do the same and share this post?

On Erev Yom Kippur, my rabbi, Eli Cohen, gave a moving sermon about Psalm 23. This psalm is most often read after someone dies, so for most of us it bears a negative connotation. Yet, it is meant to offer us consolation during difficult times in general, not just when someone has passed on.

If you don’t remember the words, here is just one translation (there are many):

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He causes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. 3 He restores my soul: he leads me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake. 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for Thou art with me; Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; my cup runneth over. 6 Surely goodness and kindness shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

For most of us, this prayer holds little true meaning. Reb Eli, however, dissected the psalm line by line until he came up with a totally new translation (below). I won’t go through his whole sermon, although would like to mention two parts I found most meaningful.

First, the line “You prepare a banquet before me in the presence of my enemies” when truly understood gave this psalm an every-day relevance to me that brought tears to my eyes. Reb Eli explained, “In Hebrew, neged tzor’rai.  Neged means “in the presence of;’ but often with the connotation of ‘parallel to.’ You prepare a table before me in the presence of, parallel to tzor’rai.

“But tzor’rai is not ‘my enemies,’” he continues. “There is a different word for that. Tzor’rai is from the same word as tzar, narrow, tight, or restricted.  Like Mitzrayim, Egypt, the narrow place. Or tzuris, the Yiddish word for troubles. Or as we sing in the El Maleh Rachamim prayer, u-tzror bi-tzror ha-chayim, to be bound up, in the bonds of life.  Tz’ror. Bound, constricted. The same as the word for a ‘pebble,’ as a pebble in one’s shoe, that which oppresses.”

Thus, the word in Psalm 23 so often translated as “enemies” actually is a word for “those people or things which oppress or distress me.” According to Reb Eli, the line really means, “You prepare a table before me in the presence of, parallel to those people and those things that cause me my greatest distress.”

The next line of the psalm and Reb Eli’s explanation struck me poignantly as well. The question to ask at this point in the psalm is: “How do I respond when at the table and faced with these things that distress me most in my life?” How do we respond to life’s challenges?

The Psalm says:  ‘You anoint my head with oil; my cup runneth over.’  Reb Eli explained that this means we have the opportunity to respond like the best of our ancient kings—even in the manner befitting the Messiah. We realize that we can rise to the occasion; we can take the opportunity to respond from our most noble selves, our best or highest selves, and see that we and the situation overflow with possibility.

Reb Eli’s mother, of blessed memory, died this summer of breast cancer. He shared with us that she liked to say, “Everyone is dealt a full shissel, a full dish”—of blessings and of troubles.  The psalm reminds us we can behave at the most difficult times—when faced with life’s challenges—as if anointed as kings and that are cups are always full.

Later on Yom Kippur during the yizkor, or memorial service, we all read Psalm 23 together in its original translation. I still remembered Reb Eli’s translation and the meaning behind each line. I cried all the way through, not because I was mourning anyone in particular. Instead, I cried because the psalm suddenly offered me the consolation it is meant to offer. Here is Reb Eli’s translation; I hope it offers you daily consolation as well. (If you pass this along, please attribute it to Rabbi Eli Cohen.)

The Eternal G-d is my constant shepherd; I shall not lack for anything. 2 G-d brings me to rest in green pastures; and leads me beside calming waters, 3 refreshing my soul; leading me in the winding paths of right action, so that all will come to know G-d’s ways. 4 Though I will walk through the valley of the shadow of death, may I fear no evil, knowing You are with me; Your callings and Your proddings are of comfort to me. 5 You prepare a table before me corresponding to my greatest challenges; You call me to my most noble self; my life overflows with possibilities. 6 Surely goodness and kindness shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the House of the Sacred for the length of my days.

Copyright 2010 Eli Cohen

As I prepare dinner for Erev Yom Kippur’s meal and think about going to services tonight, I remember the liturgy of the High Holy Days and of the Day of Repentance. I always feel I have death sitting on one shoulder and life sitting on the other.

What will this year bring for my family and me? What does God have in store for us? At this time of year, these are questions Jews ask, especially tonight and tomorrow as we are told we must complete our prayers of repentance, we must end our process of seeking forgiveness, and we must hope that God has sealed us in the proverbial Book of Life.

And so I turn to a wonderful YouTube video that reminds me well… may it also serve as a reminder to all my blog readers, Jewish or not…that we must always be grateful for every day of life and live it as if it could be our last. Plus, we should be grateful to God for all that we have and for our time here on Earth and in these bodies. We should use them well, fulfilling our purpose, caring for each other and the Earth.

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My Jewish renewal community has a traditional of doing group aliyot. In other words, instead of calling up one person to say the blessing before and after the Torah reading, they create a theme around the parshah, the Torah portion being read, and call up anyone that feels drawn to that theme to say the blessings together. Then afterward the person who read Torah blesses the whole group in a way that also relates to that theme. It’s a beautiful tradition.

During the Torah reading on Rosh Hashanah, I went up for the first group aliyah. I don’t remember the exact words of the theme now—something to do with being noticed by God. Anyway, I found myself standing in front of the table with the Torah on it. I reached forward and touched the tzitzit, or fringe, of my tallit to the place where the reader was about to begin reading, and kissed them. This is a common ritual. Then the reader turned to me and asked me to hold the right tree of the Torah open as she read.

I had done this many times before. I had done all of this many times before. However, I had not been coming to services except on special occasions—like the High Holy Days—for about a year or more. (And I had sorely missed walking my spiritual path.) I gladly took hold of the tree…the tree of life.

As did, I took a deep breath. It felt good to be there with the Torah. I looked down at the words of the Torah and marveled at the fact that after so long a time away here I was standing close enough to watch this woman, my friend, read the handwritten Hebrew there in the scroll. I could see her moving the yad, the pointer, along. I could see the whole section of the scroll. I could feel the wood beneath my hand.

Longing came over me. This sacred text, this book reminded me… I sent up a prayer, a prayer: Please God, help me write my own Torah, my own story, my own book.

Then I remembered the book I had wanted to write…the book that suddenly made sense to write, that tied all my writing projects together, that tied my seemingly disparate areas of work into one cohesive whole…I knew what I needed to do.

It was as if the words, the message, came to me out of the letters of the Torah before me or flowed through the tree into my arm and up into my head—and gave me new life.

With great joy—and sadness—I let go of the Torah after the reading. I again touched my tzitzit to the scroll, this time to the spot where the portion ended, and then I received my blessing. As I walked away I knew, indeed, I had been noticed.

Have you ever had a similar experience? Has God noticed you in some way?

As our nation struggles with another natural disaster–the Gulf oil spill, it’s time to remember the other environmental issues we have created and need to solve. We have toxic substances in our water, disappearing habitats and species, a damaged ozone layer, climate change, and more…

In this effort to remember…and to heal…the environment and the temple in which we live–Earth, one of my favorite musicians has create and offered a chant as what he calls a “wake-up call to open our hearts and minds toward the saving of this Eden which we’ve been given to steward.” Cantor Richard Kaplan‘s song, Lamenting Her Temple So Wounded ends with a global call call for a reverent mending of our “larger Temple.”

Click here to listen to Lamenting Her Temple So Wounded (4:10) Or you can download the song  for 99 cents at: cdbaby.com.

Lamenting Her Temple So Wounded is an all-English version of a track from Kaplan’s second CD, “Life of the Worlds,” where it is sung with Hebrew and English intertwined. To hear the original recording of Kinah Lekhurban Gan Eden (6:17), click here.  (This version is also downloadable for 99 cents at: cdbaby.com.)

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Here are the lyrics to the song:

Jeremiah wept, oh! hearing her song,
Lamenting her Temple so wounded (Gaia sings:) “Alas my forests are dying,
I hear my waters crying,
Have all the lessons been lost?
Oh! oh that I, oh that they, were pure again”

Jeremiah wept, oh! hearing her song,
Lamenting her Temple so wounded

(Gaia sings:) “My precious forms of life that are no more
In silence live the children of the poor
Alas! why will they not feel their disgrace?
Oh! oh that I, oh that they, were pure again”

In the night, she weeps and weeps
Longing for her lovers,
Who so seldom come to comfort her

Bring us back to You, oh Soul of Souls
Spark us to turn, that we may be seen
Mending this Temple, our Eden

For more about the creation of this piece,visit the “Writings” section of Kaplan’s website and scroll down to “track 4″ in Christina Roden’s interview concerning Life of the Worlds.

Enjoy…and heal the planet.

When we can’t seem to solve a problem, we turns to a supernal power that might provide a solution…or a miracle. Thus, more than two months into the Gulf oil spill crisis, four affected State Governors proclaimed this past Sunday, June 27th, A Day of Prayer. In other words, we turn to God for answers and for help.

While Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal declared “June 27th as a Statewide Day of Prayer for perseverance,” Texas Governor Rick Perry said “the people of Texas should join with their fellow Gulf Coast residents and others across the country and around the world to thank God, seek his wisdom for ourselves and our leaders, and ask him for his merciful intervention and healing in this time of crisis.”

According to Alabama Governor Bob Riley, “Throughout our history, Alabamians have humbly turned to God to ask for His blessings and to hold us steady during times of struggle. This is certainly one of those times.”

And Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour wrote, “Prayer allows us the opportunity to reflect and seek guidance, strength, comfort and inspiration from Almighty God…”

I urge all of us to join all those people in the Gulf who are affected—or not—and to pray for a speedy solution to this crisis. May a way to stop the oil spill be found and the birds, fish, waters, and coastlines be saved.

I spent many of my best summers along the Gulf Coast…I have many fond memories of walking along the beaches, watching the dolphins, seeing baby sea turtles hatch, watching other sea animals and birds. Even if I hadn’t, I would want this issue to be resolved…we all should. Please place the workers, the government, and all affected—human or otherwise—in your prayers.

Or try Dr. Masaru Emoto’s “Prayer for The Water,” which focuses intention on love, gratitude and healing. If you recall, Dr. Emoto is an author, water researcher and emissary for water and peace. He became quite well known for his book The Hidden Messages in Water,  which puts forth his claim that if human speech or thoughts are directed at water droplets before they are frozen, images of the resulting water crystals will be “beautiful” or “ugly” depending upon whether the words or thoughts were positive or negative.Dr. Emoto claims  this can be achieved through prayer, music or by attaching written words to a container of water.

Now Dr. Emoto has shared a powerful prayer for the healing of the waters of the planet. He explains that water is the divine conduit for spirit and all creation. By focusing our intentions, thoughts and prayers on the waters of the Gulf, we can help “heal” them. To recite the prayer, say:  “I send the energy of love and gratitude to the water and all the living creatures in the Gulf of Mexico and its surroundings. To the whales, dolphins, pelicans, fish, shellfish, plankton, coral, algae, and all living creatures . . . I am sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you. ”

By participating in this prayer and setting an intention of love and healing for the waters, Dr. Emoto hopes to perform a miracle in the Gulf of Mexico. The belief is that together we are a powerful force. Speaking this prayer multiple times daily create powerful, positive change in the Gulf and on the planet. The power of love and gratitude is greater than any power active in the universe today. To participate, repeat Dr. Emoto’s healing prayer for the waters a few minutes every day.

Or prayer for the waters in your own way, but go to some sort of extraordinary measures at this time using thought, intention and prayer to consciously create change, healing, a solution — a miracle — in the Gulf.

Judaism has a prayer that speaks of Divine unity. It also helps Jews remember that God exists not only in the “heavens” but close at hand. This prayer is called the Sh’ma. I’d like to propose that anyone from any religion or spiritual tradition, however, can take the basic premise of this prayer and use it to create a similar prayer to use each day so they feel connected to and close to God.

A traditional translation of the Sh’ma reads like this: Hear, oh Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One.

You can see that the prayer revolves around the idea that God is “one” — there is just one God. I like to also translate this as God is one with all things and all beings. Thus, the prayer becomes one of unity.

Additionally, I’ve heard this prayer translated by Rabbi David Cooper, author of God is Verb, this way: Listen closely, the part within each of us  that yearns to go directly to God, the transcendent, unknowable source of sources and the God that we are able to relate to in Its immanence is everything we experience around us, both the transcendent and the immanent, are actually, paradoxically, one and the same. In other words, God is both far and close, within us and around us. Any prayer that says this, like the Sh’ma, allows us to feel unity with our Source, a closeness with our Creator.

Back in 2008, I wrote teh following translation of the Sh’ma, which, by the way, is a Hebrew word that means, “listen”. Listen and hear, all of you who struggle to understand how we are all connected to the same God: The spark of God within you (and in others) and the flame of God that is all around you and in everything, it all comes from and returns to the same fire of God — the original Source, one and the same.

Jews say the Sh’ma several times a day, in particular in the morning and in the evening. For anyone, such a prayer  offers an easy, quick, practical spiritual practice. You can say it upon rising and just before going to sleep. This prayer is inside a mezuzah as well, so we remember this principle of unity and one God each time we pass the doorway of a room or enter or leave a home. You can do the same. Try it. Create your own version of the Sh’ma. Write your own prayer of unity and closeness to God. Start reciting it today.