Lately I’ve been feeling stuck. I want to be unstuck. Ever been there?

I’ve tried prayer. I talked to God. I cried to God. I pleaded with God.

I tried counseling. And I got really honest with myself and with others, baring my deepest feelings.

Today in the car I decided to follow Rebbe Nachman of Breslov’s advice and sing. I sang along with the songs my son played on my Ipod.

I still felt stuck.

Tomorrow I will get off my butt and start moving my body. I will exercise. No more staying at my desk all day long. I need to get the energy moving.

I also will start doing my own Kabbalistic conscious creation visualization and exercise on a daily basis again.This will help me focus on what I want in my life rather than on what I don’t want–on being unstuck rather than stuck.

Additionally I will implement affirmations into my daily practice–a.m. and p.m. These will help convince me on a conscious and unconscious level of who I truly am and can be.

And I will start using gratitude exercises in the morning and evening, reminding myself of the things for which I am thankful.

And I’ll get one thing knocked off my to-do list each day that gets me closer to my Big Goals.

The point is to change my energy as well as my thoughts and to feel like I am getting unstuck, almost like I’m pushing a car out of a muddy rut.

That’s the problem with getting stuck: All you see is the mud. All you hear is the spinning tires. And all you feel is exhaustion from trying to get unstuck.

You have to do something different. Wait for the mud to dry. Turn the tires. Reverse. Get out of the car and walk…or run.

What do you do when you get stuck? What gets you stuck?

Is there something about yourself that you consider a “negative,” something you think of as a detriment to your career or resume? Maybe you didn’t graduate from college or you’ve changed jobs often or English isn’t your first language.

Today, figure out how to turn that so-called negative into a positive. Make it an attribute. That’s right. Find some way t0 make that aspect of yourself or your life work for you in such a way that it enhances your career or resume. Show people how it makes you better at your job, more able to help others, an expert in your field.

Then hold your head up and feel proud of who you are and your life experiences.

Think about Oprah Winfrey and her weight issues. She’s struggled with her weight in the public eye for years. Her failure to lose weight could be seen as a detriment; instead it makes her an expert at why diets don’t work, weight loss issues, what diets work and which ones don’t, what stops women from losing weight, and the issues that go with the inability to achieve perfect weight. She’s an “Everywoman” to a lot of women all over the world.

Of course, you also can choose to take the path of personal growth and human potential. You can choose to change things about yourself or about your life–if this is possible. If it’s not, then turn your negatives into positives. Do it now. Don’t wait another day to feel better about yourself and to start seeing the difference this will make in your life and in your career or business.

Yesterday I wrote a post about everything being for the good. Interestingly, today when I opened my daily message from Neale Donald Walsch he had written something very similar. He said God wanted me to know:

…that it sometimes looks like “one thing after the other,” but really, it is Blessing After Blessing.

I know, I know…you don’t experience it that way. But that’s because you don’t see it that way. In this business of life, “What you see is what you get.”

If you think you are looking at struggle, struggle is what you will experience. If you decide that you are looking at a gift (even if you can’t see it clearing in this exact moment), a gift is what you will get. Just wait. You’ll see. I mean that literally. You will see.

I believe we get messages for a reason. I don’t always open Neale’s emails. I only open them on some days. The fact that I opened this email the day after I wrote a post about seeing everything that happens as “for the good” strikes me as quite synchronistic. I’ll take that to mean I’m on to something: I–we–should all try harder to see the blessing (the good) in all that happens to us. And not only will we have an easier time accepting our situations, but we will create more blessings and more good in our lives.

Lots of experts–including me!–will tell you to think positively and to speak positively to yourself.  These are not new ideas.

The fact that our thoughts are creative has been around for a long time, as the author of The Secret wanted us to realize, however, it has been no secret. As the Law of Attraction says, we must combine our thoughts and feelings to create what we want. (Add action into that formula.)

And psychologists have long known that when we use affirmations our subconscious mind tends to believe what we say. That’s why positive self talk works. We affirm that what we want is already true and the mind responds as if it is.

Many spiritual traditions also say that we know everything there is to know prior to taking on a physical body. However, as soon as we are born, we forget all that knowledge.

I watched a little girl in a video that seemd to be having a moment of remembering…and she provides a wonderful example of what it means to take time in the morning to combine our positive thoughts with positive feelings. Indeed, using these principles in the morning can help you create a positive day. She’s “doing positive self talk” or affirmations exactly as they should be done. She’s demonstration these principles for all of us–and then running off to have a great day!

So watch and learn from an expert!

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I write a blog about blogging a book into existence. (I’m actually blogging a book about how to blog a book.) So, I’m always looking for information on what types of blogs are being found by agents and publishers and turned into books.

Today I found an article about an awesome blog that was found and turned into a book. I plan to put the blog on my blog roll right after this. Finding out about this blog and book is my awesome “thing” for the day.

During the worst year of his life, Canadian Neil Pasricha decided to try to focus on the positive and come up with 1000 simple, free, awesome things most people take for granted, posting one each day on a blog 1000awesomethings.com. Pasricha, 30, who works in human resources in Toronto, won two Webby awards,  known as “the Oscars of the Internet,” at the same time that his marriage broke up and one of his closest friends committed suicide. Yet, he kept on finding little things that he found awesome…like putting on underwear hot from the drier, the moment when you unravel the knot in a necklace, finding change in your pocket, and a new checkout lane opening up at the grocery store.

The Book of Awesome, published by Amy Einhorn Books/Putnam, contains 200 of his awesome things. It’s due out this week.

Wow. What an awesome idea! And what an awesome practice. I’m going to start looking for awesome things in my life every day. How about you?

In the last week or so I’ve received a few messages reminding me to tell myself that I’m wonderful. Do you ever tell yourself how great you are?

Just before my birthday, a friend counseled me to look in the mirror often and tell myself how great I am and to acknowledge myself for all the things I accomplish each day. She asked me to actually list all the things I do and verbally pat  myself on the back for them.

Then she made me think about how often I give myself credit for any of it. In truth, I don’t give myself credit often enough–if ever. I tend to be very hard on myself and always criticize myself for not getting enough done. Like most people, I feel I’m not good enough and I must always strive to be better in almost every area of my life.

Today I received a similar message in the form of a blog post. The author told me to be passionate about myself. He linked to a blog post with the same message. She said to celebrate yourself and toot your own horn.

Okay, I’m passing on the message. Today…and everyday…tell yourself you are wonderful. Stand in front of the mirror every morning and every evening and give yourself credit for every little and big thing you accomplished and say, “I am amazing. There is no one else like me on the planet. I am special. I am great. I accomplish a lot. I do wonderful things.”

Indeed, you are and you do. And so do I!

This week I celebrated my 50^th birthday by attending a three day writing retreat. I treated myself to two extra days on the site.

Everyone just left but one woman who is staying an extra day and my roommate, who is also staying the two extra days.

Turning 50 didn’t really make that much difference to me. However, I had some writing projects I wanted to finish, and the idea of going away to finish them seemed efficient and enticing.

It also seemed a great way to affirm a few things to myself and to the world at large. It affirmed that I was worth spending time alone with. It affirmed that my writing was important—to me and in general. (This was important for my family to understand as well.) It affirmed that I was a writer. (You would think I would know this after all these years, but sometimes we need to restate what we know.) And it affirmed that if I put my mind to getting some writing done—if I set writing goals—I could meet them.

I’d never been on a writing retreat before; I’ve been writing since my early childhood years. Going away for the express purpose of only writing seemed exciting and daunting. The first few days I had the distraction of 24 writers and social time.  Now, it’s time for some serious writing, contemplation, meditation…and more writing.

What do you want to affirm to yourself? What have you not done before that you want to do?

Over a decade ago my husband became a Jew by Choice, which means he converted to Judaism. However, at the time, I vaguely remember someone-maybe the rabbi-telling me that non-Jews don’t really “convert” to Judaism. They actually just make an “affirmation of” Judaism.

My friend Reb Yitzi Miller told me basically the same thing the other day. He said he doesn’t ever refer to the act of converting as an actual conversion. He calls it an affirmation of Judaism. He doesn’t have conversion students, therefore, but affirmation students.

I suppose much like a b’nei mitzvah student (a teen studying for a bar or bat mitzvah), these people simply are learning what they need to learn about Judaism before saying, “Count me in as a Jew.”

If you think about it, a large difference exists between the two words “conversion” and “affirmation.” When someone converts, we assume that person is choosing to become a follower of one religion rather than another; they are becoming, for example, a Jew rather than a Christian. However, when we affirm something, we basically acknowledge it to be true. And therein lies the point.

When a person makes an affirmation of Judaism, they acknowledge that they were born with a Jewish soul to begin with. In other words, when they came into this world, their physical form may have been raised as a Christian, a Muslim or a Hindu, but the soul housed in that body actually was Jewish all along.

For this reason, at a deep, inner level, the person’s soul felt pulled towards Judaism, and, in the end, the physical form-the person-chose to covert to Judaism. In that process, the person makes an affirmation of Judaism. He or she affirms his or her Jewish nature.

Pretty cool, huh? Now you might dispute this as a bunch of Jewish malarkey. You might point out that many people who have affirmed Judaism (converted) have done so because, for instance, they married a Jewish partner. I’d argue that their soul drew them to that Jewish partner. It felt comfortable with another Jewish soul.

The other day, I found proof (not that I needed any) that Jewish souls exist in non-Jewish bodies. I met Dalana Castrell. She informed me that despite her non-Jewish upbringing and heritage, she dreams in Hebrew and paints Jewish symbols. She has a deep desire to learn about Judaism, and she calls God, Ha Shem, which means The Name. (Since observant Jews do not speak the name of God, this is the name they use.) If ever a Jewish soul existed, this she possesses one.

Dalana was born in South America and grew up in Queens, NY. There are a lot of Jews in Queens. Maybe her soul pushed her towards an area of the world with more Jews… She started dreaming in Hebrew, however, while on the Island of Bermuda. She told me, “I lived on estate called Southlands. This is where I started to paint my dreams; the symbols became the thread in the Image. The first series of work was called ‘Southlands the Passage.’”

Dalana’s art, which she calls ”Ionic Futurism,” feels and looks to me as if it flows out of a Jewish soul. I see Jewish stars, the Torah, a menorah, rebbes, and the like.

(For the life of me, I could not get a Jewish-themed piece to post here nor could I find examples of her Jewish-themed work, which I have seen, on line, since her website is down. However, you can see some of her other work here.)

When I speak to her, I get the sense that she is, indeed, Jewish, although she isn’t. We feel like kindred spirits.

If you see her in Great Bear Coffee in Los Gatos, which is where I met her, say, “Shalom.” She’ll say, “Shalom,” right back without batting an eye.

I’ve been so proud of myself. In the last two weeks or so, I’ve listened to spirit’s call as well as to my desire to pursue my goals.

In other words, I’ve taken positive and inspired action. I’m making affirmations of action. In my case, this means writing and completing a new booklet and ebook based on one of my book projects: Navigating the Narrow Bridge, 7 Steps to Moving Forward Courageously Even When Life Seems Most Precarious. (No, I did not actually complete the full-length book, although I was pleased to discover that at one time I did complete almost half of the manuscript. I am, however, planning to revamp the book proposal and send it out…and possibly just finish the book and self-publish it. In the meantime, the ebook and booklet are finished and will soon be posted on my website. If you want one before then, shoot me an email and I can give you info on the ebook.)

I also have sent out numerous book proposals to publishers for my Jewish celebrity cookbook project, which was supposed to be published several years ago (but the publisher backed out at the last minute after the manuscript was complete) and two for other book projects of mine. I’m determined not to let all these projects just fester away in my computer.

So, I was feeling pretty good, actually. I’d even gotten a few really nice emails recently from people who had either read my blog or an article of mine posted on line, telling me I was making a difference with my writing. My podcasting partner, Bernadette Dimitrov (aka Mrs. Claus) also complimented me on my upcoming Valentine’s Day show and told me someone would surely discover me soon and scoop my book ideas and me up. I gave a talk this week and people seemed to be receptive to my ideas and to like my presentation.

Yes…I was feeling pretty good.

Then, on Sunday evening, I decided to call a publishing house simply to make sure it still existed. In the current publishing environment, many publishing houses have gone under, and this one was on a very old list put together by a now defunct association of Jewish publishers. Imagine my surprise to not only find the company alive and well but the publisher himself working on a Sunday night. He answered the phone and proceeded to have a long conversation with me.

Suffice it to say he didn’t encourage me in any way. First, he asked about the book I wanted to send – the cookbook, but he wasn’t interested and he didn’t offer much encouragement. Much to the contrary, he had many reasons why this book wouldn’t be picked up a publisher today – unless they had lots of money or I was a celebrity myself – and why I shouldn’t bother self-publishing it either (my final choice of what to do with it).

He also asked about a few of my other book projects. I managed to tell him about two, but he shot those down…not necessarily saying they weren’t worthy (actually recommending I approach a Jewish publishing house that I’ve been told to go to by quite a few people and that almost took one of my projects…if almost counts), but telling me how my book ideas wouldn’t attract a large enough audience, and I should come up with some new ideas.

By the time I managed to get off the phone with him…maybe 30 minutes later…I felt like I should throw in the towel.

So, why would this happen when I’ve been focusing my attention and energy so consistently on moving forward and achieving my goals? Why should it happen when I’ve been making affirmations of action – actually moving towards my goals by taking positive steps? It’s that old “response column” coming into play again.

What’s a response column? There’s an exercise you can do when you write affirmations (positive statements, such as “I am now a published author” or “I am now fit and trim and enjoy my ideal weight.”) that involves having a column where you write your affirmation and another where you write the first thought – or response – your subconscious mind brings up after you write it.

In other words, as you affirm that something is true in your life – something that may not yet be true, your mind throws at you all it’s arguments about why this isn’t true. It says, “Then where’s the book? No publishing house has agreed to take one of your manuscripts yet. You are flabby and 10 pounds over weight.” You get the idea. You know your subconscious mind has finished arguing about your affirmations when the only responses you get are positive ones. (To read more about this, you might want to check out this old blog post: http://purespiritcreations.com/wordpress/2008/05/07/affirmations-of-action-and-my-response-column/) Eventually,

Additionally, a response column is a bit like the idea that when you begin practicing deliberate or conscious creation, sometimes called The Law of Attraction, and start focusing on what you want, everything unlike what you want begins to show up. Why is this? Some say its the residual negative thinking coming into play. Some say it’s the Universe or Source Energy or God testing your will to see how badly you want what you say you want. I’m not sure why it works that way, but it often seems that just as you get most focused on what you want and try to plow forward towards your goals – and to stay positive – some outside force throws lots of the opposite at you (and lots of negativity).

What are we to do when this happens? I always ask myself how badly I really want this thing? In this case, how badly do I believe in what I’m doing and feel that trying to get my work published is the right path for me? Will I let one person sway my belief in myself and my work? Will I let the naysayer just increase my determination and drive to accomplish my goal? For me, it’s the latter.  (Not to say the experience wasn’t a bit depressing…) And that sometimes I feel the need to think a bit about what is said to me and to ask myself if the fears or doubts expressed by ther person – that I have had myself – don’t have validity. If not, then I plow on.

Today, I began again. I sent out several book proposals. Then I got an email from a woman all the way on the opposite coast of the U.S. who is flying me in (actually gave me Frequent Flyer miles) to speak to a Hadassah group. She told me that someone else is bringing an additional group to hear me speak at Hadassah that night. And, one person in that group is going to miss my talk and wanted to hear what I had to say so badly that she asked permission to have someone videotape the talk for her.  Wow.

Now that’s the kind of response I want in my response column. Is it possible I’m nearing the the point when I’ll only get positive responses? Wouldn’t that be nice!

And after that…the affirmations should begin to manifest!

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Back in the days when I was training to become a rebirther and was enrolled in a variety of workshops and classes offered the Loving Relationships Training, which is still run by Sondra Ray, I learned about something called my “response column.”

Typically, when writing affirmations — you know, those positive statements meant to help create change in yourself on a subconscious level — we would include one column on the page for the affirmation itself and then another column for our “response” to the affirmation. That response represented the first thought we had to the positive statement we had just written.

For example, if I wrote the affirmation, “I, Nina, now experience perfect health,” in my response column I might write, “But I have a headache.” I would then write the affirmation again, and my response might then be, “Yeah, right, that’s why I get at least three colds every year.” You get the idea.

Why bother with a response column? It might seem that, contrary to the point of the exercise, instead of focusing on the positive you’re actually focusing on the negative thoughts. Actually, by using affirmations with a response column, you allow your negative thoughts to surface. You acknowledge them and continue with the affirmation, effectively replacing the negative thoughts with the positive ones until eventually — after days, weeks, sometimes months — your response column begins to fill with positive responses, like, “Yes, that’s true,” and “I do, indeed, enjoy perfect health.”

Sometimes, however, when we are making changes in our lives or doing things that push the envelop of that with which we feel comfortable, the world around us becomes our response column. Lately, that’s been the case for me.

Recently, I pushed forward with a project of mine and managed to convince my literary agent to take on my Kabbalah of Conscious Creation book. As my literary agent left for New York City last Friday morning to begin a month of meeting with editors at publishing houses that will conclude with a trip to Los Angeles to attend the Book Expo America, where he will meet with more editors and publishers for several days, the possibility of my dream becoming a reality took hold. My positive action — my affirmation of action, as Stuart Wilde likes to call it, began to develop a response column. The world began to bring me evidence of my negative thoughts. You see, although I want my book to be published, having it out in the world in a big way (and me with it) brings up some fear, especially given the book’s topic — generally speaking, it’s about the Law of Attraction from a Jewish mystical perspective.

Every day I affirm through my actions that this book will be written with integrity and honesty and my highest desire to serve. Yet, in response, what have I most recently received? First, I received a package of articles written and published in newspapers and magazines by a rabbi adamantly opposed to the type of book I’m proposing to write. I’ll just mention that I received these articles from him because a friend suggest that I write to him and ask to speak at his synagogue. He didn’t get past the one topic related to my book (I have lots more) before he sent me a somewhat nasty email and then these articles, which discussed how horrible it is for unknowledgeable New Agey people (Like me?) to write about “energy” Kabbalah (Is that what I’m doing?). Needless to say, he declined to have me speak to his congregation.

I also received an article sent to my by my agent and published in the New York Times Magazine, which was written by someone who went to the Kabbalah Center and had some not so nice (and some nice) things to say about it’s brand of Judaism and Jewish mysticism. (Most people I know and respect don’t have anything good to say about the Center either…) I’ve never been there, but I admit I have some of their books. My feelings about them are mixed.

And I’m left staring at my response column — It even shown up in written form! — and wondering what to do with it. Well, actually, I know what to do with it. I will acknowledge that what has appeared simply represents my negative thoughts (“I’ll be judged for my beliefs and thoughts.” “Those I respect will judge me negatively.” “People won’t like me for who I am and what I believe and what I write.”) And I’ll continue making affirmations of action. I’ll continue writing and moving forward with this project.

Today, I reorganized my booklet on the same subject and contacted another expert to ask for help. Yesterday, I worked a little on my book proposal. I’ve decided to write an introduction addressing some of these issues to put them out in the open. Soon, you’ll see a new blog, which I’ve been creating, on the subject of the book and with the same title, The Kabbalah of Conscious Creation.

And you know what? Just before I finished this blog, I checked in on a Beliefnet forum (Kabbalah and Jewish Mysticism) to see if anyone had commented on something I’d written there. Lo and behold, someone told me they thought the work I was doing was wonderful! A positive response from the universe…

I guess that response column exercise worked well. It only took about a week to clear out the negative thoughts and to replace them with positive ones!