Letting a Child Leave the Nest
I didn’t mind when my children went off to school. I was happy for the free time, time for myself to do the things I wanted to do.
I missed my children when they went off to camp, even shed a brief tear, but always felt happy for them and for myself. They would have a fun experience and I would have a small “vacation.”
I’ve talked about my daughter going off to college for a year or more now. I’ve been excited for her. I know she’s ready for college…more ready than most kids her age. Yet, now that the time has come to say goodbye to her, I’m not ready.
How can that be? After all these years when I’ve allowed my kids–even pushed my kids and encouraged my kids–to be independent and enjoyed their independence with them, I’m not ready for her to be quite so independent. I’m the one who always says it’s the mark of a good parent when I child is raised to be independent. That’s what you want, not some 18 year old (or even a 12 year old) who is tied to his or her mother’s apron strings. But what if I’m tied to hers?
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a mother with nothing to do once my nest has been emptied of chicks (pardon the mixed metaphors). I 
can easily fill my time. I just didn’t realize how empty it would feel with even one chick having let the nest.
Yes, I’ll miss my daughter. She’s a quite one, but the house will be much quieter without her. And I must figure out how to cut the apron string, how to stay in the nest while she spreads her wings and flies.
And maybe that’s the trick…Each time a chick leaves the nest the mother bird must spread her wings a bit wider as well, not just so her reach is longer but so she can test her strength and her ability for new doing new things as well.
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